at times, I look back at what transpired between May and June, and can't help but feel crippled with fear
I've never been at such a stage in my life - a crying mess, an uncontrollable insomniac, an overthinking fool
the thought of everything still haunts me from time to time
I thought I experience darkness before, but no, that was truly the worst.
the cold sweats in bed, social anxiety, sleepless nights of overthinking, my brain on overdrive, my body weak from crying all day
I never ever want to be in that bad place anymore.
This was what it was like to be swallowed whole, and grasping onto what bits and pieces I have left of myself
I will not let anyone, not even the love of my life, do this to me again.
I'm no longer going to be the same weak person that anchors her happiness onto the whims of others
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