Tonight I've fallen

I don't know what should I feel right now. What should I do? Who should I listen to? What to do for the rest of my life? Collected my O level results today. It felt so surreal and weird, like I'm finally growing up. Four/five years of secondary school education for just this one ticket to your future. And I've got my ticket, yet my destination is unknown. I guess I got what I deserved, I was quite complacent with my studies, only starting to put in real effort during July/August. I wanted more, you know, to be on par or at least a bit behind my sisters but right now, my path is way off. My parents strongly believe in good education, always wanting the best resources for their kids, hence they don't mind paying huge sums of money on books and tuition. Both of my sisters entered Temasek Junior College. I can't even enter Meridian, that's how off I am. I know my mother is sad even though she told me that I did well. And I just really don't know what to do right now. ...damn.
Should I go to SP, which is 22 MRT stops away or TPJC, which is not really a good JC but a JC nonetheless and work my ass off for the next 2 years? I'm a person that is easily weighed down by a bit of pressure, so it's either I change my repulsive attitude and laziness or I choose to go to poly. I don't know, after getting my results, I feel that I must be more independent and strong, and not flimsy and indecisive. Once I've made my choice, I've got to stick with it and stay on track. Never to run out of the path or to lag behind. Be consistent and increase my speed to overtake the rest. That's what I should do... but can I even do it? I need a chance.
God answered half my prayers and I'm thankful for that. But for the other half, I'll have to do my best to achieve it.
I want to get into a local uni, not a private and overseas one, not because I'm biased but just trying to be pragmatic. The difference between a diploma and a degree is a lot, the difference can be a few thousands. The difference between a degree from a non-local uni and a local uni is also big. I want to have a steady job and good future. I want to be able to support my family and my children(if I plan to have them) I want to own a house, and not depend on my parents or my spouse.
Even if I choose the poly route, it'll be hard to enter uni, only the top 5% can get that opportunity. Yet even if I take the JC path, it isn't a guarantee that I can get into uni, although the chances are higher. A levels is gonna be a tough cake to sink my teeth into.
Life is hard in Singapore. Very hard.